Ten reasons a dog is better than a wife:
The later you are, the more excited your dog is to see you.
Dogs like it when you rub their head.
Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.
A dog’s parents never come to visit.
A barking dog will shut up once you let them in the house.
You never have to wait on a dog; they’re ready to go 24 hours a day.
Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.
A dog will not wake you up in the middle of the night to ask, ‘If I died, would you get another dog?’
If a dog smells another dog on you, they don’t get mad. They just think it’s interesting.
And last, but not least:
If a dog leaves you, it won’t take half of your stuff with it.
For a definitive test of why a dog is better than a wife, try putting your dog and your wife in the car trunk for an hour and see which one seems happier to see you when you open the trunk.
Then there’s this sinister reason: If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away.